badlybent.ca

I had one of those “aha” moments the other day.  No, not that A-Ha, the Swedish band from the 80’s.   Although come to think of it I was singing Take on Me last week too.  Wow, 1 sentence in and I’m already off-topic….that’s a new record, even for me.

As I was saying, a deep, profound thought occurred to me as I was being cut off in traffic be some asshat in a Mercedes who was obviously more important then I am.  Actually, two thoughts occurred to me, but I won’t print the first one, instead I’ll enlighten you on the second.  That thought was this: we could solve almost every single problem in the world if we all acted like everyone else on this planet was as important to us as we are to ourselves.

Or, as Bill and Ted said “Be excellent to each other.”

Makes sense, don’t it?  I mean, think about it, there probably isn’t a problem we couldn’t solve if we started putting others before ourselves.  Let’s take a look at a few examples:

•     World Peace - That’s kind of a duh.  We sure wouldn’t want to invade other countries and shoot people if we valued their lives more then our own.  And religious persecution and wars would halt immediately because we’d all just realize that you can have your God, I can have my God, and hey, what do you know, pretty much every God says we should all just get along and treat our fellow humans with respect.  Go figure.  People wouldn’t be persecuted for being gay, for being a different colour, etc.  We’d all just look at each other and say “cool, you like to do that, I like to do this.” This of course does not include fans of the “Twilight” vampire movie.  They will always continue to suck

•     Greed - One of the main reasons that the “hands of the have-nots keep on falling out of reach” to quote Gordon Lightfoot, is that you’re trying to get yours, and I’m trying to get mine.  There aren’t many people on earth who couldn’t give up something to help someone less fortunate.  And if we all cared more about other people, it would be a lot easier to put the systems in place so that what was needed got to where it was needed without involving massive corporations, charities, etc.  And corporations would stop making ‘getting your money’ their number 1 priority.

•    World Hunger - See above.  As I mentioned, if we all just gave a certain percentage where it was really needed, people could be fed.  And since a lot of hunger is caused by things like abject poverty, wars, and greed, then yeah, it could be fixed as well.

•    Disease - This one is both tricky and easy.  If I were a better writer I would sure as hell come up with a better way to say that, but here’s what I’m saying:  Do you know what kills more children in the world every year then anything?  Diarrhea.   Yup, good ole-fashioned diarrhea.  Children drink water that isn’t clean, it gives them diarrhea, and they get it so bad, and for so long, that they die of dehydration and malnutrition.   And it isn’t even that we have to purify the entire world’s water either, although that’d be a good idea too.  There are re-hydrating tablets available that can both help stop the diarrhea AND rehydrate the cells of the person.  They’re literally pennies a tablet.  PJ O’Rourke once looked into this very issue, and concluded that nobody gave a shit (pun intended) because it’s not a ‘glamorous’ cause, like AIDS or breast cancer.   He figured that to raise public awareness we should all wear brown ribbons and go with the slogan “Diarrhea, it can be contained”.  You should read him, he’s brilliant.  Oh, and while we’re on the subject - hey breast cancer marketing people, wanna lay off for a bit? Thanks.  There are a lot of other types of cancer that are out there too, all of em horrible and terrible, but all we hear about is breast cancer.  I should hire those P.R. people to work for me.  Which reminds me - you all know what a huge fan of irony I am, well, apparently there’s a company out there, I’m thinking it’s TFal for some reason, but I could be wrong, that’s selling Pink Frying Pans, with the proceeds going to breast cancer research.  Funny thing is, they’re Teflon coated pans……and Teflon is being researched as a possible cause of….drum roll please….CANCER.  Insert heavy sigh here…..

• The Environment/Climate Change - Look, we can all debate whether or not we humans are destroying Earth until, well, until the Planet dies, but let’s look at a couple of important things.  Firstly, if you look at most of the studies that are saying that humans are not responsible for climate change, you’ll find that they’re funded by interests that pollute.  They have a vested interest.  I don’t trust vested interests.  Hell, I don’t even trust people in vests.  Or ascots, the most unfortunately named piece of attire ever.  Say this out loud “hey, look everyone, I have my ascot around my neck!”  See?  In the interest of complete disclosure I’ll give you my view.  I think that part of what’s going on is a natural cycle.  Since we humans only live for about 80-90 years or so, if we’re lucky,  we tend to forget that the universe and nature can work in cycles of, say a million years.  It’s hard for us to comprehend because we as people think that we’re the centre of the universe, and that things started, and will stop with us.  Having said that, however, I also think that whatever natural cycles are taking place, human beings are also trying their damnedest to destroy the planet too.  How can even the most anti-climate change person in the world argue that cutting down areas of Rain Forest the size of Simon Cowell’s ego can be good for the planet?  Besides making Iceberg Vodka, what good are the polar ice caps melting?  Please tell me the advantage of forcing species after species of animals into extinction.  Cancer, asthma, etc.  rates are through the roof, and you can’t site there and tell me that at least some of that has to do with what we breathe and eat?  If you can seriously tell me that you honestly believe all that, then…well…..I don’t even know what to say to you.   “But Steve, what the hell does this have to do with putting others first?”  Well, it also relates to greed as well - people just have to have more money, and more stuff.  To do that, corporations just have to post as huge a profit as possible, almost to the complete exclusion of consequences, as long as they don’t break the law.  “Hey, this new manufacturing process that we have uses asbestos, UFA, arsenic, and Thalidomide, but it’ll raise our dividend an extra 4 cents per share” Most people don’t need a big huge SUV, but dammit I can afford it, so screw the rest of you.

• Stress - Most stress is caused by other people.  Traffic stress, job stress, etc.  People put stress on us because they are stressed out.  Assclown in the Mercedes that cut me off is under stress because he obviously has to get where he’s going in a hurry, so instead of driving with consideration, he drives like a maniac, not caring whom he cuts off.  Deadlines are caused by someone not having enough consideration for people to make sure that there is enough time to get things done properly, and without freaking out.

Okay, there you go - in one fell swoop I’ve solved everything.  All before lunch.  I’m kidding, obviously,  knowing is sometimes less then half the battle.  But if we don’t as a species, start thinking more about our fellow person, then we’re hooped.  Oh, just so anyone doesn’t sit there thinking “Gee, I wish we could all be perfect like Mr. Stevie Z here” then you’re way off.  I’m part of the problem.  The difference between me and some people, I think though, is that I recognize that I’m part of the problem, and am trying to fix it.   I said trying.  It’s not easy.  The fact that we live in a society that almost forces people to put themselves first doesn’t help.

So, what do we do?  Well, try this: every day, do one or two things that put other people first.  Even small things.  Let that guy in front of you who’s trying to turn out of that parking lot onto a busy street.  Give something to a food bank, or better yet, give some time to a food bank.  It’s really really easy, honest.  If everyone did that, there’d be 10 billion really, really nice things happening every day.  Wow, that’d be cool.

Stevie Z